Since writing my last post I have been contacted by several people offering support and telling me they admire me for being strong and making my life-changing decision. Then there were a handful of others who also made me question whether I am strong or if I had just taken the easy way out. The choice I made was right for me, but it may not be the right choice for everyone.
The decision to stay in or leave an unhappy situation is very difficult, I know because I stayed for over 6 months and until you are in that situation, you do not know how hard each day is. Every day you have to try to make everyone around you believe that everything is ok, that you are happy.
Those who remain in this kind of situation and continue to be unhappy do so for many reasons. Most commonly to remain as a single family unit, usually to ensure the happiness of their children. They are prepared to sacrifice their happiness for the knowledge that they are sheltering their children from the turmoil that surrounds most separations.
Simply, there were two choices, the first was to stand up and be selfish by doing what was best for me; the other was to stay and do what was best for the people around me. While I chose to get out of the situation and people feel that what I did was brave, I also feel that the option to stay and fight - to put others’ happiness first is, in my opinion, the option that shows most bravery and courage. It shows that the person making the decision feels that the alternative would weigh too heavily on their conscience.
“Conscience is the root of all true courage; if a man would be brave let him obey his conscience.” James Freeman Clarke
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